On being called little

Every damn time I take Truett out I get a medley of these comments:

"He's so little!"

"He's SO SMALL!"

"How much did he weigh when he was born?" "Seven pounds," "Wow! Really?"

This is probably my favorite:

"Wow, how old is your baby?"

"Five weeks."

"Wow, I like, babysat a TWO WEEK OLD the other day who was bigger!"

Is this supposed to be a compliment? Because to me, a small baby suggests something like maybe he's not eating enough. Or maybe my hormones are interpreting each and every comment as an insult.

I was grocery shopping the other day and Truett began to whig out towards the end of the trip. So I'm in the dairy aisle, not even totally sure what I'm tossing into the cart, just FINGERS CROSSED we get out of here alive. Sweating slightly because I'm now the woman with a crying baby driving everyone else crazy. Sleep deprived, omitting whatever is not ENTIRELY NECESSARY from my list, WHEN...ever helpful woman marches over to my cart and begins stroking Truett's belly trying to comfort him. Perhaps on another day this would have been endearing but woman, you don't even know me and here you are fondling my seven week old. She didn't even LOOK at me. Just kept rubbing his belly and shushing him, which he did because all he wants, all he EVER wants is attention. The reason I was trying to haul balls out of the store. The very reason you are thwarting right now, lady. 

She eventually looked up at me and said, "God bless babies." or something along those lines and I'm thinking, that's not how I feel right about now but okay, so long as you walk away and let me finish my trip. She walked away. Truett started crying again. She walked BACK and started to shush him again. JESUS CHRIST. I know you probably have four grown kids who all excelled in everything in every way and you are just trying to share the damn wealth? But I would really like to get him home and out of public before I get kicked out of this store for CRYING BABY. When she eventually walked away the second time, and Truett began crying again she looked over and me and was all, chuckle, chuckle, "You know what I think? I think that baby is a little bit spoiled!"

Yep, that's it. Nail. on. the. head. I frequently put chocolate in my breast milk and let him stay up past nine. He is also allowed to watch R rated movies, can you believe it? We don't believe in setting boundaries at our house, no, no, we tend to our baby's every need. CRAZY, HUH? He is after all the ripe old age of seven weeks. He is SO headed for doom. Probably the world's next Paris Hilton/Andy Dick screw up because I don't let him cry it out. 

Now. I feel better. Thanks.

Comments

[The Mom]

Truett is long and slim. All these busy strangers see is his face and maybe arms. Strangers always seem to feel it is okay to comment on pregnancy and on babies. Truett is healthy, growing, filling out and very energetic. So booya to the busybodies.

[Nancy]

Ditto what The Mom said. Your description is so funny. So familiar. Let me give you the heads-up on other store behaviors: when Truett knocks over a display (1) grab his arm, (2) look straight ahead, and (3) KEEP ON WALKING. Nothing to see here, folks.

[Hope Sypert]

Nancy, I can totally see you doing that.

[Courtney shaw]

UGH! When people tell me that Terry Lee is spoiled (because holding an infant to get them to calm down/go to sleep will make them evil spoiled little brats bent on destroying the moral fabric of society, you know), I want to kick them. Hard. But that's just because I'm a terrible mother who has NO CLUE how to raise her child. Oops, sorry, my bad...