Grape Did It

Second to last day of Take Life By The Balls Month

And I put in my notice at work.

It feels delicious. One more month of scanning.

The house story

A short buying a house story:

About three weeks ago Bud drove me past a house in a neighborhood I had not, until then, been crazy about. I remarked with my typical, um, okay, I don't love it from the outside, but I'd be willing to look.

The next weekend we went to eighty million houses and scuffled and scraped around each one, trying to picture ourselves there and I know you think the term eighty million is an exaggeration, but to a sick feeling pregnant person, it is not. I think after this trip we both felt disappointed, left with a feeling of, we-eeel, some of them were okay. Or, that one would take a lot of initial work to make it feel like home but the price is good. In other words, or words only I would use Bud would be embarrassed to, none of the houses spoke to us.

The next day Bud suggested we take the motorcycle to see the house we'd driven by previously, since there was an open house. I'll bet you even know where this story is going. Again I dragged my feet, I'm sure rolled my eyes but said okay because at some point people you just have to get  out of the damn house.

Wouldn't you know it? I loved the house. Nay, I LOVED the house. HOWEVER I kept hearing my dad's voice telling me not to get emotionally invested, there are always plenty of others, blah, blah, BLAH. Right?

We offered on it, low, and they came back, high. I was disappointed, yes, but it just wasn't a situation we could do anything about. Had they come back less-high or willing to talk or what have you, that might have changed the situation. But we felt a little like they'd chipped off three dollars and then handed us that new price with a smirk. Um, thanks? (Probably they are very nice people and didn't smirk at all but that is how it feels am I right?)

ANYWAY. Through our agent we told them sorry, no can possibly do, but let us know if you decide to come down on the price in this range.

A loooong week later we got a call from our real estate agent saying they had reconsidered and would sell us the house at a price! A price we could afford! Then there was much jubilation and wine drinking except I am pregnant so instead we went out for Mexican food. Mmm, Mexican food, now I am kind of wishing for that.

Things aren't a done deal yet, as they never seem to be with adult decisions, I swear how do people ever actually get things done? But we've all settled and signed on a price and we had the inspection Tuesday. The inspector found some fixes and so now we...wait until we have an idea of what to do about those problems and who fixes or pays for what. It. is. excruciating. Because I am so not in the mood to let my baby sleep in a drawer in this apartment.

Ah, you didn't think this wouldn't come at a price, did you?

And so, the magic pill that helps tremendously with the debilitating nausea? Um YEAH. Also creates less than desirable side effects and I will not go into detail. I know it seems like I have no boundaries on this website, but oh, I was never pregnant before and wow the things they didn't tell me.

On that same note, but happily not bodily function gross, I have been googling the side effects to the baby for the two medicines I was prescribed and if I could give one bit of advice to anyone, anywhere who has access to a computer it would be DO NOT GOOGLE THINGS. Nothing good can come of it because for every post I read that said something like, "Oh it's fine, I took with all three pregnancies, no problem lol." I also got, "Yeah well, I'm not sure enough studies have been done and you may just possibly be a baby killer. Sleep well!!!!"

Okay, that last one was a little bit of an exaggeration, but the internet is not known for being clear. And so I'm taking as little as possible of either but trust me when I say, you would not want to have been over at our house last night for the whining factor alone.

Aaaand...bum ba da bum! Speaking of houses, it looks like we MIGHT have one! We're still in the beginning stages of buying though, so more details (and picture, eventually!) to come later.

Breaks up the argument, at least

"It's just...you're such a spendthrift!"

Blank. Stare.

"Well, I, I'm not actually sure what that means."

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure you just used that word incorrectly."

16 weeks

YES. I am still trying to figure out how to smile, lift my shirt and take a picture all at the same time. Without looking like What? I'm pregnant? Or, better, Against all better advice, yes, I am drunk. Anyway, here is photo number one of 16 weeks, finally beginning to show:
Photo number 2, with Bud. See? I'm trying to smile and instead look as if I've just spotted a Snickers bar in the mirror. And boy, if there's something I like more than a farmer in overalls, it's a good old fashioned chocolate bar.

Assvice never goes out of style

My mother lent me her baby book: A Child Is Born, by A. Ingelman-Sundberg, photos by Lennart Nilsson. It contains some of the first in-utero pictures of developing babies and is breathtaking to page through.

However, the changes that have occurred between the late 70's (when this book was published) and now with regards to pregnancy advice are sometimes startling. One of my favorite passages, on a woman's second visit to the doctor's office:

"She is weighed, for her weight tells all too clearly if rolls and cakes have been abundant in her diet."

Here doctor. I've baked you a pie. It is filled with paternal condescension. No? You don't like that flavor? But I thought EVERYONE DID.

Why I should probably still be given child proof caps

Yesterday morning I woke up, stumbled to the bathroom and took an anti-nausea pill. I wasn't feeling terrible but the nausea was in the background and I hoped to catch it before it became worse. My hope with these medications is to not use them everyday, and hopefully to stop using them all together when supposedly the hormones die down a little and you get your life back in the second trimester. That's what everyone says. Wait until the second trimester, it's the best, you feel better, but aren't huge yet. Which kind of begs the question, waaait a minute, what about the third? But by then the person has walked away AND I CALL THAT FORESHADOWING.

About ten minutes after taking the pill I wander into the kitchen to fill my snack bag for work - Bud peers into it from time to time and reminds me it looks like I'm going on an expedition - and what should I see in the bag? But the DAYTIME PILLS. THE ONE I SHOULD HAVE TAKEN BEFORE WORK. THE ONES I PURPOSELY SEPARATED FROM THE OTHERS FOR JUST THIS REASON.

"Ohmygod Ohmygod OHMYGOD, Buuuud!"

"What? What? What?"

"I..oh no!..ohmygod I can't take more time off work. Oh no!"

"What? WHAT?"

"I took the wrong...ohgod...I took..."

"The nighttime pill?"

"YES!"

Mind you this is after someone (hi Tammy!) told me I wouldn't wake to a fire after having taken one of these little babies.

I spent a couple of minutes agonizing over what to do and finally decided to make a strong cup of coffee and just try to get through the day. Yes I was nervous of driving off of the road but I also reasoned that you don't prescribe a pregnant woman a narcotic THAT strong. So I strapped on my big girl pants, all the while just wanting to crawl back into the bed, and drove to work.

Turns out it wasn't that bad. Once in a while I'd find myself walking and think, hm, my leg just sort of floated to the side rather than emphatically moving forward. And also the copying machine swam before me a little. But really? It was no more than the way you feel after a big lunch and a long, boring staff meeting.

Oh wait. Except for I did see a dog walking himself but only for a second. Turns out he was attached to a leash and a person.

The reason alone we can't use that name

Bud suggested Clementine this morning for a baby name, if it's a girl. Thus all morning we have been singing, Oh my Daaaarlin, Oh my Daaarlin, which turned into, It was Rotten, It was Rotten, because do you realize those two songs - the one about the rotten peanut and and my darlin Clementine - sound the exact name?

Month 4, update

This morning I went in for my 4 month appointment, though I won't be 16 weeks until Saturday. Still, feels odd that after this weekend I will be in my 5th month of pregnancy. How did that happen? No, no, I get it, it was rhetorical.

Amidst the flurry of activity that is my doctor's office, I was able to ask, breathlessly, isthereanythingIcantakeforthecontinuednausea? You have to be quick here, this office is perhaps the busiest doctor's office in the entire world and the briskness with which I am whisked through leads me to believe that all the women in Birmingham were getting busy in November, if you know what I'm saying. Because my goodness you sure are in a hurry with me. Which is not to imply they are unfriendly - not at all, the doctor I saw today (mine was in surgery) called me Senorita and I kind of dug it - they are just faaast at what they do. Anyway. I have now been prescribed not one but TWO different anti-nausea drugs and one will make me sleepy so it is only to take at night. I'm sort of looking forward to it.

I also heard Cider's heartbeat again and before the doctor rushed out of the room I asked what it was. 155 beats per minute. Is that not the BEST heart rate you've ever heard? Just the CUTEST number in the entire world? Cider continues to amaze me with his cleverness. Her cleverness. Quit making me do this we aren't finding out the sex so I will continue to interchange his and her, he and she. BOY AND GIRL IF YOU WILL.

Another small bit of only-exciting-to-pregnant-mothers - we heard HIM kick while the monitor thingy was on my belly. It went something like thump thump thump thump thump THUMP thump thump and when I looked up at the doctor she said, "Oh! She kicked!" WHEE.

That and a strong cup of caffeine free herbal tea because the coffee makes my pregnant belly hurt

Can't get my online photo editor to work so I could show you the sweet daffodils Bud plucked for me the other day while out on a walk with Copper. One of the many mornings I'd like to fling this computer over the balcony and into the woods behind our apartment. If only I had the spare thousand or two I'd need for the new one I want.

But the birds are all tweet, tweeting because it is another balmy day in February. Maybe I should just enjoy my technology-free morning.